Dear doctor,
I have gained 10 kilos after 2 invasive surgeries in the abdomenI do not accept the fact that my beautiful belly is destroyed by scars, not being the same as before, my movements are limited by pain, after 6 months, since the last one they are still present, I look ugly, aged and I no longer feel wanted, to this I add that I have been fighting for years against a depression that leads me to consume antidepressants, no one understands my discomfort, to this are added financial problems that force me to give up even a cream. The only consolation is the foodIn fact, the desserts, every day I tell myself today is the last, but then… I am extremely lazy and I have no more stimuli. Please help me, I am afraid of getting sick from food and this leads me to gain more and more weight.
Best regards.
Reply:
Dear reader,
in your words I see a lot of suffering, deep, where weight and food are just the tip of the iceberg. I have the impression that you have changed the vision you have of yourself, compared to what you were a few years ago, you have become more severe and critical and you look at yourself with an eye that is not kind. Also, the fact of feeling unrecognized in your sufferingWithout a doubt, it adds a great emotional charge and it is here that food becomes the easiest of lightning rods, which does nothing but increase your negative experience of anger, mistrust and frustration.
So darling I really believe that first you must take care of your depression, appropriately, because the fact that in many years it still hasn’t improved makes me think that there is something to change. Get in touch with a public health center in your city: (the CAP, a Hospital or your GP) and get treatment to improve your depressive state and ONLY AFTER, or when you have full access to all your emotional and cognitive resources, can you achieve important goals, such as weight loss, with the concentration and commitment they require.
In the meantime, please read and use the instructions in my free guide. In this way, you will be able to change those mechanisms that lately made you gain weight and gradually lose confidence.
Start as soon as possible to implement everything that is written and I will be happy if you keep me updated on the progress.
RECOGNIZE THE SITUATIONS THAT INVOLVE A GREATER RISK FOR YOU AND FIND ACTIVITIES THAT DISTRACT YOU
There are some situations in which you may be especially at risk of overeating, and learning to recognize them can be very helpful.
Let’s see what they are:
– Situations in which you experience negative emotions: Anger, anxiety, loneliness, a strong argument, can often cause you to eat too much.
– Situations in which you experience positive emotions: you might find yourself in a situation where “you celebrate” with foodgood news, vacation or a joyful meeting.
– touching moments: a pleasant evening with lifelong friends, where there are food offers and the mere fact of seeing them makes you give in, even if you are not hungry.
– irresistible desire for food: Due to the diet rigidity you can more easily fall into temptation. better one balance dietwith at least 5 meals a day, than a very strict diet, which cannot be carried without being constantly hungry.
– Counterproductive Thoughts: Thoughts like “when I’m stressed, I absolutely have to eat something” or the like lead to losing control and overeating.
When you are in any of these situations you can find alternative activities to help you divert attention from food to something else.
Do you want to know how?
You must prepare:
– a to do list (for example, call a friend, read a book, take a shower, go for a walk…)
– a list of things to think about (for example, it will soon pass, I can do it, hunger is not an emergency…)
ALWAYS CARRY THIS LIST WITH YOU AND USE IT WHENEVER YOU NEED IT!
Remember that an alternative activity will be effective if:
- makes you pass the time
- possibly it’s nice
- Makes access to food difficult
Now you have a series of useful information to better manage your relationship with food.
I invite you to try to put into practice the 3 indications that I have just suggested.
However, if after a while you realize that you cannot get out of this problem, Valentina, I invite you to contact a psychotherapist to help you work, first of all, on self-esteem and on all aspects that hinder your mood and your weight loss.
Good luck darling!
