It’s getting closer to Christmas and with it also comes the annual Christmas party with both galley and conference. Of course it’s great to meet colleagues outside the office, but will you be able to handle it?
You were born with a hunger for mulled wine and just want to let loose after an intense autumn. You do too, but you may regret it the next day. Here are the mistakes you will probably manage to spot during the festivities.
1. You showed up alone
You had missed the mass mailing! Everyone in the department arranged a meeting before the Christmas party and joined them there. You therefore show up all alone to the party. You try to break in and take a role in the group dynamic but become loud, intense and desperate.
2. You missed the dress code
As a newly single person, you want to highlight your best sides and show up in a Christmas red, super tight case, the only problem is that the dress code read: “unsightly clothes”. You have trouble keeping things in place when the pentathlon starts…
3. You get too drunk
The dinner is long and every middle manager wants to present the year’s results with catchy Christmas rhymes or in boring powerpoints. You have time to drink both your own and your table neighbor’s wine. Suddenly all the bottles within reach are empty, you discover everyone’s eyes on you…
4. You take over the dance floor
Was there even a dance floor before you started dancing? No you created it, a one man dance floor.
5. You flirt with everything and everyone
You have practiced the bedroom look for a long time in the mirror. You make eye contact with as many as you can to check out who might possibly flirt back. Or, you think you’re throwing flirtatious glances, but in reality you’re staring uncomfortably at people.
6. You come to the conference in your underwear the next day
You’ve just learned the phrase “Casual Friday”, to show that you’re in, you show up in cozy brawls.
7. Or: You come overdressed to the conference
To make up for yesterday’s lack of clothes, you put on your best outfit. The experiment doesn’t work, your colleagues think you’re snooty in your new feather boa and sparkly tiara.
8. You forget a colleague
At lunch, you introduce yourself politely and ask what the table neighbor’s name is and what they work with. You get a sigh in response. You have worked in the same room for almost two years.
9. You realize you had a social media psychosis the night before
During your coffee break, you pick up the phone and discover that you have over 100 small notifications on both Facebook and Instagram. You’ve gotten away with the cell phone camera. No one was safe yesterday, all colleagues have been exposed to your selfies, groupies and shaky video clips in the toilet. You’ve had a social media psychosis.